I'm currently 39 weeks pregnant and definitely feeling it! In a world of friends "going early," scheduled inductions and c-sections, and the lucky few whose water breaks "right on time," it can be frustrating to be patient and let nature take it's course, especially since it seems like most people expect no one in their right mind to actually get to their due date. (Remember: 39 weeks is full term, first time moms generally naturally go to 41 weeks, and women who have had a child before tend to hit 40 weeks, 3 days, on average.) I try to avoid public discussion about my pregnancy this late in the game, but do try to take such comments with a grain of salt. After all, people are well meaning and just trying to make conversation. I've asked my blogging friends to contribute to this post of "what NOT to ask or say to a woman who is 39 (or beyond) weeks pregnant!" Check it out and see if you can relate!
- "You're STILL pregnant?"
- "It'll be over soon enough."
- "This too shall pass."
- "Enjoy the quiet while you can."
- "You better catch up on your sleep now!" (as if that's possible anyway…)
- "You haven't had that baby YET!?"
- "WOW! You look like you're about to POP!"
- "Are you SURE you're not having twins?"
- "Wow…you don't even look that far along!" (translation: I just look fat and swollen.)
- "Are you going to breastfeed?"
- "When is your doctor going to induce??"
- "Please tell me you're getting an epidural."
- "You are HUGE!"
- "You look like you have dropped!" (Why shouldn't you say this, you might ask? Well, it gives false hope to those who don't know that some moms don't ever drop at all, some drop weeks before birth, and most women who have had a baby before sometimes don't drop until labor actually begins.)
- "You are making my stomach hurt!" (yeah…..sorry about that…. ???)
- "What are you/baby measuring?" (Whether it be estimated weight of baby, fundal height, cervical status, or whatever, it just doesn't matter. And frankly, I don't need anyone to know the state of my cervix, thank you very much.)
- "Have you tried [castor oil, walking, sex, spicy foods, moving furniture, cleaning, pineapple, mango, acupuncture, massage, or other natural induction method]?" Just don't.
- And last but not least, do not try to predict when the baby will come, especially if you are a doctor or midwife. Telling a woman at 37 weeks that she could "go any minute" makes her pretty darn unhappy by 41 weeks.
These comments don't bother me anymore, because I feel well educated after doing this for the third time. But, it can be a very depressing day to hear so many of these comments, and most of us can't just sit in solitude until labor begins. So, my suggestion is just to just smile and keep comments and suggestions to yourself. Chances are, the woman has heard it all before anyway.
Special thanks to the awesome bloggers from: